Now I better come up with something exciting to say

So I spent several hours last night tinkering with my comments section so it looked all fancy and fun … and I’m thinking well that was interesting but ultimately useless unless I start coming up with some vastly more interesting blog entries that what I’ve been doing lately because let me tell you they have not been comment worthy in the least.

And not that this is going to be but here is a Friday grab bag of random bulleted things:

  • I have somehow found myself volunteering to be Team Mom for softball this season. I’m not one of those participating Mom kind of people so this is surprising. We’re with a new league this season and at try-outs all the other moms clearly knew each other so I think this was my desperate attempt to fit in and be popular. Have you met middle school me yet? She was joiner and a kiss-up. Only later did I become snarky and surly.


  • In the last week I have had all my parts and pieces picked at and viewed and palpated and whatever else – except my teeth , still need to schedule that one -but the good news is that all tests and screenings came back negative and it is relatively reasonable to assume I might live another year.


  • I completely wiped out my hard drive, reformatted it and re-installed vista from scratch and it’s actually quite nice when everything is working properly.


  • I think I might have made one of my friends mad at me and I don’t know how. She’s acting different and distant though and I wish she would just say what I did so I can apologize.


  • I’ve become very interested in Facebook, some interesting people from the past are showing up on my radar. Ones I didn’t know that well then but I think are worth getting to know better know that we are all older and wiser.


  • I feel like I stuck in a Twitter rut.


  • I haven’t been taking many photos and this weekend I hope to cure that.


  • The sun is shining and I want to go outside and play

Typepad Frustration

Tried installing the new Typepad Connect jazzed up comments deal but as usual with all things Typepad the Advanced Templates instructions are incorrect/non-existent. Sigh.

It says to paste the code after "Find the second instance of the <MTEntryIfAllowComments> tag" in the Individual Archives Template. Well let me tell you that tag doesn't even occur once much less twice in my file and I checked the standard three column default template code as listed in the knowledge-base and it's not there either.

Have tried searching the knowledge-base for any hint of other instruction… there is none.

Clearly I have comments so … I have no idea where to go next.

Typepad like a bad boyfriend you disappoint again and again. You make WP look sexier and sexier.

Phoning It In

So January has officially kicked my ass. Someone blow the whistle please I’m ready for a new month. Can it be that it is only Wednesday?


January is the hangover that all the fun you had December gives you.

February now that is a good month!

It starts out with two back to back holidays.. Ground Hogs Day and My Birthday!


Then we’re on to Valentines Day. That glorious hallmark holiday designed to remind our tired suburban husbands that they love us. Hey Honey!! You Love Me!!!

Then we get President’s Day!

February is such a cool month that it can’t be bothered with days that start with 3.

I can’t wait till February.

Let it be said by our children’s children that when we were tested we refused to let this journey end

I know that we all watched it yesterday, we viewed it in record numbers, we captured in high def, we streamed it to the entire planet. It made us cry and sent chills down our spine.

But tears dry, and chills fade.

You need to READ IT. Hold it. Touch it. Feel it. Read it.

Take it, print it out, and sit down in a quiet place, undisturbed and READ IT. Examine it. Dwell on it.

Let it sink into your soul. Let it mark you.

Keep it. Forever


Inaugural Address

By President Barack Hussein Obama

     My fellow citizens:  I stand here today humbled by the task before us, grateful for the trust you’ve bestowed, mindful of the sacrifices borne by our ancestors.

     I thank President Bush for his service to our nation — (applause) — as well as the generosity and cooperation he has shown throughout this transition.

     Forty-four Americans have now taken the presidential oath.  The words have been spoken during rising tides of prosperity and the still waters of peace.  Yet, every so often, the oath is taken amidst gathering clouds and raging storms.  At these moments, America has carried on not simply because of the skill or vision of those in high office, but because we, the people, have remained faithful to the ideals of our forebears and true to our founding documents.

     So it has been; so it must be with this generation of Americans.

     That we are in the midst of crisis is now well understood.  Our nation is at war against a far-reaching network of violence and hatred.  Our economy is badly weakened, a consequence of greed and irresponsibility on the part of some, but also our collective failure to make hard choices and prepare the nation for a new age.  Homes have been lost, jobs shed, businesses shuttered.  Our health care is too costly, our schools fail too many — and each day brings further evidence that the ways we use energy strengthen our adversaries and threaten our planet.

     These are the indicators of crisis, subject to data and statistics.  Less measurable, but no less profound, is a sapping of confidence across our land; a nagging fear that America’s decline is inevitable, that the next generation must lower its sights.

     Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real.  They are serious and they are many.  They will not be met easily or in a short span of time.  But know this America:  They will be met.  (Applause.)

     On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord.  On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn-out dogmas that for far too long have strangled our politics.  We remain a young nation.  But in the words of Scripture, the time has come to set aside childish things.  The time has come to reaffirm our enduring spirit; to choose our better history; to carry forward that precious gift, that noble idea passed on from generation to generation:  the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free, and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness.  (Applause.)

     In reaffirming the greatness of our nation we understand that greatness is never a given.  It must be earned.  Our journey has never been one of short-cuts or settling for less.  It has not been the path for the faint-hearted, for those that prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame.  Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things — some celebrated, but more often men and women obscure in their labor — who have carried us up the long rugged path towards prosperity and freedom.

     For us, they packed up their few worldly possessions and traveled across oceans in search of a new life.  For us, they toiled in sweatshops, and settled the West, endured the lash of the whip, and plowed the hard earth.  For us, they fought and died in places like Concord and Gettysburg, Normandy and Khe Sahn.

     Time and again these men and women struggled and sacrificed and worked till their hands were raw so that we might live a better life.  They saw America as bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions, greater than all the differences of birth or wealth or faction.

     This is the journey we continue today.  We remain the most prosperous, powerful nation on Earth.  Our workers are no less productive than when this crisis began.  Our minds are no less inventive, our goods and services no less needed than they were last week, or last month, or last year.  Our capacity remains undiminished.  But our time of standing pat, of protecting narrow interests and putting off unpleasant decisions — that time has surely passed.  Starting today, we must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and begin again the work of remaking America.  (Applause.)

     For everywhere we look, there is work to be done.  The state of our economy calls for action, bold and swift.  And we will act, not only to create new jobs, but to lay a new foundation for growth.  We will build the roads and bridges, the electric grids and digital lines that feed our commerce and bind us together.  We’ll restore science to its rightful place, and wield technology’s wonders to raise health care’s quality and lower its cost.  We will harness the sun and the winds and the soil to fuel our cars and run our factories.  And we will transform our schools and colleges and universities to meet the demands of a new age.  All this we can do.  All this we will do.

     Now, there are some who question the scale of our ambitions, who suggest that our system cannot tolerate too many big plans.  Their memories are short, for they have forgotten what this country has already done, what free men and women can achieve when imagination is joined to common purpose, and necessity to courage.  What the cynics fail to understand is that the ground has shifted beneath them, that the stale political arguments that have consumed us for so long no longer apply.

     The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small, but whether it works — whether it helps families find jobs at a decent wage, care they can afford, a retirement that is dignified.  Where the answer is yes, we intend to move forward.  Where the answer is no, programs will end.  And those of us who manage the public’s dollars will be held to account, to spend wisely, reform bad habits, and do our business in the light of day, because only then can we restore the vital trust between a people and their government.

     Nor is the question before us whether the market is a force for good or ill.  Its power to generate wealth and expand freedom is unmatched.  But this crisis has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market can spin out of control.  The nation cannot prosper long when it favors only the prosperous.  The success of our economy has always depended not just on the size of our gross domestic product, but on the reach of our prosperity, on the ability to extend opportunity to every willing heart — not out of charity, but because it is the surest route to our common good.  (Applause.)

    As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals.  Our Founding Fathers — (applause) — our Founding Fathers, faced with perils that we can scarcely imagine, drafted a charter to assure the rule of law and the rights of man — a charter expanded by the blood of generations.  Those ideals still light the world, and we will not give them up for expedience sake.  (Applause.)

     And so, to all the other peoples and governments who are watching today, from the grandest capitals to the small village where my father was born, know that America is a friend of each nation, and every man, woman and child who seeks a future of peace and dignity.  And we are ready to lead once more.  (Applause.)

     Recall that earlier generations faced down fascism and communism not just with missiles and tanks, but with the sturdy alliances and enduring convictions.  They understood that our power alone cannot protect us, nor does it entitle us to do as we please.  Instead they knew that our power grows through its prudent use; our security emanates from the justness of our cause, the force of our example, the tempering qualities of humility and restraint.

     We are the keepers of this legacy.  Guided by these principles once more we can meet those new threats that demand even greater effort, even greater cooperation and understanding between nations.  We will begin to responsibly leave Iraq to its people and forge a hard-earned peace in Afghanistan.  With old friends and former foes, we’ll work tirelessly to lessen the nuclear threat, and roll back the specter of a warming planet.

     We will not apologize for our way of life, nor will we waver in its defense.  And for those who seek to advance their aims by inducing terror and slaughtering innocents, we say to you now that our spirit is stronger and cannot be broken — you cannot outlast us, and we will defeat you.  (Applause.)

     For we know that our patchwork heritage is a strength, not a weakness.  We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus, and non-believers.  We are shaped by every language and culture, drawn from every end of this Earth; and because we have tasted the bitter swill of civil war and segregation, and emerged from that dark chapter stronger and more united, we cannot help but believe that the old hatreds shall someday pass; that the lines of tribe shall soon dissolve; that as the world grows smaller, our common humanity shall reveal itself; and that America must play its role in ushering in a new era of peace.

     To the Muslim world, we seek a new way forward, based on mutual interest and mutual respect.  To those leaders around the globe who seek to sow conflict, or blame their society’s ills on the West, know that your people will judge you on what you can build, not what you destroy.  (Applause.) 

     To those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent, know that you are on the wrong side of history, but that we will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist.  (Applause.)

     To the people of poor nations, we pledge to work alongside you to make your farms flourish and let clean waters flow; to nourish starved bodies and feed hungry minds.  And to those nations like ours that enjoy relative plenty, we say we can no longer afford indifference to the suffering outside our borders, nor can we consume the world’s resources without regard to effect.  For the world has changed, and we must change with it.

     As we consider the role that unfolds before us, we remember with humble gratitude those brave Americans who at this very hour patrol far-off deserts and distant mountains.  They have something to tell us, just as the fallen heroes who lie in Arlington whisper through the ages.

We honor them not only because they are the guardians of our liberty, but because they embody the spirit of service — a willingness to find meaning in something greater than themselves.

     And yet at this moment, a moment that will define a generation, it is precisely this spirit that must inhabit us all.  For as much as government can do, and must do, it is ultimately the faith and determination of the American people upon which this nation relies.  It is the kindness to take in a stranger when the levees break, the selflessness of workers who would rather cut their hours than see a friend lose their job which sees us through our darkest hours.  It is the firefighter’s courage to storm a stairway filled with smoke, but also a parent’s willingness to nurture a child that finally decides our fate.

     Our challenges may be new.  The instruments with which we meet them may be new.  But those values upon which our success depends — honesty and hard work, courage and fair play, tolerance and curiosity, loyalty and patriotism — these things are old.  These things are true.  They have been the quiet force of progress throughout our history.

     What is demanded, then, is a return to these truths.  What is required of us now is a new era of responsibility — a recognition on the part of every American that we have duties to ourselves, our nation and the world; duties that we do not grudgingly accept, but rather seize gladly, firm in the knowledge that there is nothing so satisfying to the spirit, so defining of our character than giving our all to a difficult task.

     This is the price and the promise of citizenship.  This is the source of our confidence — the knowledge that God calls on us to shape an uncertain destiny.  This is the meaning of our liberty and our creed, why men and women and children of every race and every faith can join in celebration across this magnificent mall; and why a man whose father less than 60 years ago might not have been served in a local restaurant can now stand before you to take a most sacred oath.  (Applause.)

     So let us mark this day with remembrance of who we are and how far we have traveled.  In the year of America’s birth, in the coldest of months, a small band of patriots huddled by dying campfires on the shores of an icy river.  The capital was abandoned.  The enemy was advancing.  The snow was stained with blood.  At the moment when the outcome of our revolution was most in doubt, the father of our nation ordered these words to be read to the people:

     "Let it be told to the future world…that in the depth of winter, when nothing but hope and virtue could survive… that the city and the country, alarmed at one common danger, came forth to meet [it]."

     America:  In the face of our common dangers, in this winter of our hardship, let us remember these timeless words.  With hope and virtue, let us brave once more the icy currents, and endure what storms may come.  Let it be said by our children’s children that when we were tested we refused to let this journey end, that we did not turn back nor did we falter; and with eyes fixed on the horizon and God’s grace upon us, we carried forth that great gift of freedom and delivered it safely to future generations.

     Thank you.  God bless you.  And God bless the United States of America. (Applause.)

What to do if your stuck with a spousal Lost Addict

Seeing as how the The Interwebs are all caught up in OMG LOST STARTS TONIGHT frenzies I thought I might repost a little ditty from last year for all those of you who are new here and who are stuck with spouses that drive you crazy with this show.

The Dr. is a huge fan of Lost. I am not. I took one look at the pre-release commercials and declared that I had enough questions left unanswered with the original Gilligan’s Island and did not need more heaped on by a J J Abrams remake.

So he records it and watches it later. Later meaning when I’m busy doing something else. But over the years I’ve wandered through the room enough to have some grasp, albeit probably somewhat incorrect, of the story line.

Here is what I do to amuse myself while he is minding his own business desperately trying to enjoy his show. I wander in and out and ask annoying questions.

Me: "Isn’t she/he supposed to be dead?"

Him: "It’s a flashback" (blood pressure rises)


Me: "Why are some people off the island and other’s aren’t?"

Him: "It’s the future." (hair stands on end – huffs in my general direction)


Me: "How far in the future because that baby doesn’t look any bigger than it was on the island. Babies grow fast."

Him: "Shut up"

Later still:

Me: "I thought she/he was killed on the Island, now she’s in the future? "

Him: "It’s the past again!!" Poof his head explodes

THIS is far more entertaining to me than the show ever could be.

Hello Lover…

image So did I tell you that I got a Kindle for Christmas? No? That must be because I’ve been reading non-stop since the minute it was charged up. That’s right reading.


Like a 15 year old teenage girl who’s obsessed with books.


Remember how TIVO/DVR changed the way you watched TV?

Remember how Netflix changed the way you selected DVD rentals?

That’s what the Kindle will do for your reading … Yeah it’s that cool. And you’ll start reading again!

I love the fact that I can download a book anytime anywhere.. on the fly just fire it up the wireless Whispernet or whatever they call it and Bam there is your book. I downloaded a book in the bathtub last week people!!! 

I don’t know how many books I can keep on it but I haven’t hit the limit yet.. so enough okay. And when you’re done you can offload the file onto your computer. It’s yours for keeps you just move it back and forth to the Kindle through a USB cord – the computer treats the Kindle like a drive.

So all those books that you hear about or see someone else reading but always forget the title of when you are standing in the bookstore.. not anymore. Just download now and read when your in the mood.

The books are cheaper this way to.. bestselling hardbacks are $9.99 rather than $25+ so gone are the days of waiting for the paperback to come out and then forgetting about it all together because it takes to long.

Can’t decide which book to take to the beach? Take all of them!! Read what you are in the mood to read, not what you brought.

Read Again!

If you’ve been holding back because of some romantic notion that you can’t give up the feel of a book in your hands .. just do it. The features far outweigh any nostalgic tradeoffs. It will re-open the world of books to you. Trust me.

It’s like when you first got a DVR and felt weird watching a show in delay, because you were 10 minutes behind you were somehow out of sync with the universe but then you quickly came to realize that watching a show in delay without commercials and perhaps back-to-back with other episodes is far more enjoyable.

Or when you skeptically joined Netflix thinking there was no way a mail order service for DVDs would be more efficient than just hoping in the car and running over to the video store. But then you realized that without the impending return deadline you enjoyed the movies you selected without feeling like watching them was homework and you started watching a much broader range of movies because you could queue just about any movie ever made up and surprise yourself with it when it turned up in your mailbox.

I’m not different than you. I love the touch, the feel, the smell of a book. The satisfaction of feeling the weight shift from right to left as I progressed through a thick novel. But this device works. It provides availability in way that bookstores cannot. Portability in a way computers cannot. In today’s digital world it provides opportunities for us to read books again.

Will I throw out my dog-eared copy of Pride and Prejudice? No

Will I still buy beautiful box sets of Anne of Green Gables and Laura Ingalls Wilder for my girls one day – You better believe it.

But in the meantime we’re downloading Ramona, Beezus, and Junie B faster than you can imagine and do you know how much I’d rather see my daughter sitting by the fire with my Kindle and sipping some hot chocolate than playing her DS?

Proof that with a little creativity you can make any post about the Twilight Series… Or… how to ignore Gator Football

28686_featureSo last night as the game progressed and the husbands became more and more engrossed in the football game.. not like it was the National Championship or anything  …the wives grew more and more ambivalent and looked for other amusements.

After the feature pieces aired on the quarterbacks it occurred to us (the wives) that Oklahoma’s Heisman winning quarterback Sam Bradford was way more what we had in mind when reading the Twilight Series than how Hollywood actually cast the character of Jacob and so we decided that since he had clearly reached the pinnacle of his college football career he should take over the role of Jacob. He’s got that perfect mix of little boy face but great big body which is going to be very essential to the plot of next next couple of movies because of the way Jacob ages/grows. Imagine that curly hair all grown out ladies!!

And after quite a bit of this the husbands got all disgruntled because

A. OMG are you people still talking about those damn Twilight books!
B. Will you all stop talking favorably about the other quarterback, clearly Tebow is the bomb and
C. Bradford’s a child and way to old for you ladies to be looking at that way …

At which we ladies laughed.

Then we informed them that no, that for once there was a new double standard that was working in our favor… we could lust after young quarterbacks and we were simply Cougars… sexy sleek cats full of danger and intrigue. However if they ooggled the little cheerleader girls they were still either perverts or having a mid-life crisis. Sad either way. So sorry.

Then there was this whole discussion about the difference in a Cougar and a MILF. In the end we decided it had something to do with who was the aggressor.

By this time the husband’s heads kind of exploded. Poof!

But in the end the Gators won. And I’m happy … for my husband because he loves them and I love him.

So congrats baby… you said I wasn’t being supportive last night but secretly I was. I just couldn’t bear to show it.


And Bradford would make a really good Jacob.

All New Levels of Vanity – Eyelash Extensions…

So there I was on Dec 19 happily getting my pedicure when I look over at the other side of the salon and notice some woman getting something other than the normal waxing torture done to her in the eyebrow waxing chair. I asked what it was …

“Eyelash Extensions” they said.

“Extensions?” I asked, “How long do they last?”

“10 days! You want?”

“Sure!” I agreed. (Note to self – stop drinking the cheap wine they give you during pedicures.. between the that and the foot rubbing there is no end to what I will agree to)

And so began my love/hate relationship with these eyelash extension things… we’re on day 20 and only a few have fallen out. I’m not sure if I aggravated or addicted.

May I present.. My Eyeball:


So here is what I’ve learned:

  • Much like fake fingernails and hair color this is not a simple 10 day commitment as I first thought. Sure I could forcefully pull/pick them off but it would take half of my real eyelashes with it. You have to wait for the glue to break down for them to fall off naturally and without damage.
  • They take some getting used to
  • This is why all the celebrities have such great eyelashes!! I can now spot them on every TV show I watch.
  • If you are getting this done, do not wear your contacts while they do it. Wear your glasses to the salon. They have to move your eyelid around a lot and your contact will not be happy underneath. Afterwards, contacts are fine once your eye settles down from watering.
  • The glue stings a little eyes a little – it stops after an hour or so.
  • If they itch or burn at first wait it out – it stops after a day or so.
  • You will not need mascara – which is kind of cool
  • Water does not hurt them, do not worry about them coming off in the shower
  • They will fall off separately and you’ll look kind of patchy
  • You can go to Walgreens and buy them and put them on yourself but like all beauty products it’s hard to get it DYI right without lots of practice


Not sure where I’m going to go with it from here… right now I’m in this sort of self maintenance mode with the DYI part hoping that the drug store glue isn’t as strong as the professional stuff ( as is typical with beauty products) so I have more flexibility once the pro ones fall out.